What do they say when you walk out the door?

Aren't we all experts on our friends lives? We know what their "issues" are, how much their "baggage" weighs, and we are also blessed with the solutions to all of their problems. If only we had the guts to tell them.

In an interview with Dr. Phil, he said that he had left private practice because of his frustration with clients that wanted to stay clients, even after he had given them clear advice on how to solve their problems. They didn't really want to bring and end to their woes, just talk about them. Every week. For 50 minutes. With him.

What about you? Would you want to put an end to your business, career or personal troubles if offered a solid solution?

Several years ago, I hit a point in my life where nothing seemed to be working. My career and family life were out of balance, I didn't feel very well, my business was growing but not in ways I expected or was prepared for. I kept tweaking the formula of my attention and nothing seemed to work. I did something that sounds simple, but it simply wasn't done.

I surveyed the people in my life that spent the most time with me: friends, family, co-workers, employees and individually asked them this: Imagine that you are gathered with my circle of friends. I come in all cranky about my life, and then leave the room. What would you all agree on that I needed to change or do with my life. I asked them to be blunt.

I did this with 4 or 5 people. They all had the exact same answer. Some of these people had never met each other, but they all knew me. Guess what? I did what they suggested and it worked. It took a long time for me to go through the process, but I did it and I am 100% happier and healthier.

Does your life seem a wee bit out of whack? Try it. Ask them "What do people say about me when I walk out the door?" It usually starts with something like "If she could just stop going back to that man!" or "Why doesn't she just tell her mother she can't send her anymore money?" or "Stop writing prisoners!".

If all of your peeps say that you should start a business, do it! If they all say you should quit that job, maybe their perspective gives them something you should listen to. You are surrounded by advisors, make an appointment!

What Mary thinks of Dr. Laura

Last month YOU-FM, the home of Mary in in the Morning, switched to an all talk format. Will it be a ratings coup? A bomb? It will be a couple years before we know for sure, but the line-up of shows has certainly gotten some tongues wagging. I'm thoroughly enjoying the comments I'm getting from listeners.

The reaction so far has been completely random from love to hate, very little middle ground here. The prime time line-up includes the Queen of the Left, Stephanie Miller who airs immediately after Mary in the Morning; Dave Ramsey the Live Debt Free guru who brings Jesus into the conversation with callers quite comfortably; the acerbic Dr. Laura is there for your afternoon drive, followed by rightie-pants Jerry Doyle.

When I'm out and about I'm asking people their thoughts on the line-up, 90 percent of the time the conversation leads to: "Mary, what do YOU think of Dr. Laura?" This is a very polarizing question, or at least I think it is meant to be. If you say they you like Dr. Laura, people can fit you into a box full of assumptions (pro-life, anti-gay, women should stay home with the kids, blah, blah, blah) So here you have it: I love Dr. Laura for being Dr. Laura. I don't agree with many of her positions on how we humans run our lives, but I do respect and cheer for her decision to not be politically correct.

This woman has balls.  Dr. Laura filters her callers questions through a simple filter of right and wrong, black or white, her way the highway. She doesn't have the inclination or interest or time to sugar coat it. She gives her opinion. And that is why people continue to call and take the abuse. She makes the drama of our lives so simple. Do this, goodbye, Next caller....

Even when I'm disagreeing with her, calling her names, rolling my eyes at the radio, I am completely and thoroughly enjoying myself. I try to catch at least part of her show every day. We seem at times to be a nation of very stupid people, and Dr. Laura is one of the only brave voices out their.

Most importantly, Dr. Laura has been on the scene long enough that every caller to her show should know what to expect. She is so predictable that she couldn't possibly be accused of ambushing anybody. Simplistic? Yes. Heartless? Perhaps. Ambivalent? Never!

Tune in to Dr. Laura daily 3-6PM and let me know your thoughts on her show.

Mary